Programming By Karnivore Kayla!


by Karnivore Kayla!

Your programming is as good as what you make of it.

I somewhat stole this idea off of multiple blogs with the title being something to the effect of “The best programming is the one that you believe in” or “The best programming is the one you’re currently following”. I agree with both of those. But I want to talk about perspective.

Everybody knows what’s good for them. Sort of. We know that involving ourselves in an activity is good for our health. Doesn’t matter if it’s CrossFit or yoga or barre class, finding an activity that sparks your interest is worth sticking with. When beginning the CrossFit journey, most people probably start by participating in class. Meaning the classes available to members, ya know, it’s like a set schedule and sometimes people show up in the morning because they have real jobs they have to tend to, or maybe at noon because it’s their lunch break from their job, and sometimes they show up in the evening because they’re work is over! The beauty of showing up for a class is, you just have to show up (preferably on time). You don’t get to pick the movements, or the time domain, and god forbid you might have to share equipment with someone! Oh, say it isn’t so!! But those are the elements that kept you coming back in the first place. Back in the old days before you knew whether you preferred suffering for a long period of time or dying in a short amount of time…before you knew the difference between a clean and a jerk…before you even remotely cared about efficiency and how close you need to keep your jump rope, rowing machine, and pull-up bar together in order to get THE most stellar time on the board. And before you know it, you have officially earned your title as a CrossFit snob.

I will be the first to admit that I was the original gangsta of CrossFit snobs. I was a CrossFit snob before I even started CrossFit.

Mom: “I’m doing this really cool new thing! I can’t really compare it to anything I’ve done…I think you’d like it!”

Kayla Snob: “Yeahhhh no. I’m good. I’m doing like, a million hours of double days and I’m fit enough.” *hungover, taking bite out of bagel*.

Long story short:

-Started CrossFit (because my mom made me), went to the 7:00am class everyday, and I loved it!

“Errrrrrmerrrgerrrrd I can use the red band now!”

-Quit volleyball to continue CrossFit, and now it was time to fine tune the skills.

Mom: “Where have you been? Your dinner is cold…”

Kayla Snob: “Sorry I went to the 4:00pm class.”

Mom: “It’s 7:30pm…”

-Everyone be on the Invictus grind so I had to get me some of that.

Kayla Snob: “Okay part A will take about 10 minutes, Part B will take about 20 minutes, Part C is seven 5 minute AMRAPs, and Part D may or may not cut into CHEM108B.”

-Then I was lucky enough to receive my own personal programming (Forever grateful, Jason).

*Walkin’ into every gym like* “Hey! Todays WOD looks like fun (no it doesn’t), but I have my OWWWWWN programming so is it okay if I spend just like, 3 hours in the corner doing it by myself? Thank you!”

-And then my body hurt, I had other goals not CrossFit related, and exercising for one hour (as opposed to 5) never sounded so appealing.

*Boasting to my past-self like* “Yo kAyLa SnOb!! I do half the training you do and I STILL beatchoo!”

So, this not-so-short, long story reminds me of all the opportunities I missed by not participating as a member at a CrossFit gym. I think about how many gyms I’ve been to and have not experienced their programming. If I didn’t cherry pick my movements would my goats still be my goats? I think about the challenges I could have been faced with by getting beat by others in class (cuz when you W-O-D by your lonesome self, you’re always a winner), and how that could have made me better! Think of how many more friends I could have had!!! But no, I was a single body that wasted valuable space in a gym where hard work, sweat angels, and high fives could have replaced my snobby, don’t-need-no-coach, strategizing-every-move, almost-zero-intensity self.

I have to mention that the reason I got on my own programming in the first place was because it was my goal to qualify for regionals as an individual, and I did. I worked SO freakin hard and it paid off. Could I have done it just by taking classes? Absolutely. Because the thing that makes a really good CrossFitter, is actually doing CrossFit. There is no ideal routine, expect the unexpected. Sharing the experience of doing movements that you might be really awesome at or really suck at with other people is what makes you grow, it sparks relationships, and its what keeps you coming back. If you’re the best at something, you want to continue to be the best at it. And if you botch a movement or a workout, Jesus, redeem yourself! Don’t be “the guy that sucks at burpees”, be proud of your movement and tackle those weaknesses! Every person around you is going through the same pain, and it doesn’t matter if you finish first or last, just finish. Now jumping back to perspective, pretty much any workout you throw up on a whiteboard you can say “Ugghhh this is gonna blow”. WHEN DOES IT NOT BLOW. I don’t ever really recall being in the middle of a workout being like, “This is so amazing for me, I feel so sexual, CrossFit is lyyyyfe!” It’s always going to be hard, but you’re always going to feel better afterwards if you pushed yourself. Let us all remember that this is optional, nobody is making you do CrossFit (except when my mom made me), and there are endless activities outside of “The Sport of Fitness”. But I believe that it is the most effective form of exercise out there if the movements are constantly varied and functional, performed at a high intensity.